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2018 Best New Talent - Short and Sweet Festival Sydney
2014 Pushcart Prize nominee. (more)

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July Novel Month - Novel No. 1 - Borders of Bordavia




Brief Synopsis


Isybelle and BB must travel beyond the Borders of Bordavia to
rescue the mysterious Elfy, but come face to face with an evil Queen
and her insect armies who are preparing for invasion.


(The following prose has been updated since this post in 2011)







Borders of Bordavia


Chapter 1

Filip felt much older than his forty-three years. The greys had sprouted like raging turnips. No wonder. He had been under an insane amount of stress. Many of his friends had died. Yet he wouldn't have time to miss them. It would soon be his turn. If he was to die, he would make certain that he was the last.
He had mere seconds to put Plan B into action. The insect guards were changing shift, leaving him alone inside the underground laboratory. The female creature that ruled the mountain who had enslaved them all was determined to leave in five days. And she wasn't planning to leave anyone behind. No-one alive that is.
Plan B would take the full five days to unfold. Working as diligently as he could, Filip went to the rack at the back of the stone room. He took a beaker of turquoise liquid from the lowest shelf. On the next row up were six half-full metallic containers that he had prepped the previous day. He took one, unscrewed the plastic lid and poured in a tiny amount from the beaker, mixing it with the liquid already inside. He re-tightened it and moved to the next one. He had to work fast. In a matter of days, the concoction inside the containers would reach a toxic level and dissolve the lid. The gasses would escape and pour into the air vent tucked away behind the rack. It would be nasty. The nastier the better.
He sealed the last container and raced back to the bench just as the door opened. A new insect guard entered. Its antennas were twitching. It studied him.
Filip’s face remained without emotion, but his hands were trembling. He hoped the guard wouldn't notice. The insects were loyal but not so bright. It closed the door and took position next to it.




Filip would continue working now, though he was almost finished. Only a few final tests remained. He was an expert in the development of fossilized fuels, a new field of study in Bordavia. With the guidance of the dark mountain Queen he had made barrel loads of it. He had learned things from her that he never dreamt scientifically possible. The Bordavian way of life was very simple. Flight or even motorized vehicles did not exist. At least not yet. Maybe that would change if he ever got out of here. Judging by what had happened to the other scientists after their usefulness was over, freedom was unlikely. He knew that she was coming for him soon. He had to be ready.
The Queen needed the fuel so she could begin her journey from the mountain. She had been unable to create it on her own. The other scientists had been abducted for different reasons. She used them to experiment on living beings. It was nothing short of barbaric. The scientists had been forced to cross breed assorted creatures; experiments so horrible he couldn’t bear to think about it. These creatures were dangerous to their designers. Many scientists had died during the process. Though some still had hope. They actually believed that the Queen would take them with her when she left. Others thought that she would grant them a reprieve and set them free. Filip knew better. They were as good as dead already.
Everything the Queen did served some higher purpose. There was something going down, something big and Bordavia stood to be worse off by the end of it. That’s why he hadn’t told any of the others about his plan to get rid of her. It wasn’t that they weren't good people, but the Queen had a way of finding things out. Sooner or later she would come to visit him, to check the results of his final fuel tests. Plan B was already in motion, but he had to try Plan A first. If he happened to pull it off, he could escape and perhaps free the others too.
He hadn’t expected her so soon however, so when the door opened he was instantly on edge. After all this time, she was still an imposing figure. She was covered from neck to toe in a shimmering black cloak, almost like a bat. Her face was dark and skeletal, as though metal rods had been jammed beneath her skin. Her eyes were grey and without life as though nothing lurked inside. But Filip knew that she possessed a sharp intelligence. It was such a shame that she was so vicious. He grew hot with nerves and hoped his face wouldn’t turn red and expose him.



She glided towards the bench as mysteriously as a shadow. Her bony fingers flickered impatiently in the air. ‘What is your progress?’ she demanded, her voice grating like metal filings.
'I, uh, have a… minor setback.'
'A what?’ she shrieked. 'There is nothing minor about a setback!' She moved closer, seeming to fill the room. Her smell was nauseating.
Sweat grew on his forehead like tiny beads of betrayal. He reached beneath the bench, his fingers jittery, finding the vial and bringing it into view. It contained a weird mix of olive and brown fluid. He hoped curiosity would overcome her. 'I believe that this new compound will…' he swallowed, his voice threatening to break up, '… balance out the blemishes.'
'There are no blemishes!' she screeched, sounding like a sea shell being scraped against a salt encrusted rock. 'We were finished! I came for the final test results. What is this muck you present?' She bent for a closer look.
Filip thought of the people that he had come to know. There had been many Bordavian prisoners when he had arrived, only to watch them die, one at a time. He had to do this right, for them, and for those few still alive. Yet his heart was racing so fast it was hard to get the words out. 'This is the... uh... answer to all… our problems.' He yanked the rubber stopper from the vial.
She sensed something wasn’t right. Her voice went up a notch. 'Our problems? Or yours!'
Filip raised his arm to hurl the vial, but at the same time there was a dark blur and his forearm became enclosed in her steel like claw. He cried out in panic as she twisted his arm and the liquid began to pour onto the floor. 'No. No!'
The properties of the liquid changed in the open air, sending out a billow of grey smoke. He had planned to throw it on her. She should be dissolving by now, but instead the toxin lay wasted on the floor, steaming toxic vapours. The smell was horrendously sharp and he spluttered. This was bad. He knew his lungs were already melting in his chest.
She was unafraid of the fumes, so certain was she of her superiority. 'Humans are so unconvincing. I should only be surprised at how long you’ve survived.'
She squeezed harder and his muscles gave way and the vial dropped from his hand and smashed, splashing his leg. He screamed as his flesh sizzled. His legs gave way. He somehow managed to avoid falling on the liquid but the noxious gases swam all around him.
She covered her foul mouth and floated backwards to the door. ‘It makes no difference. You've already completed your task.’ She laughed like a robotic crow.
Filip could only respond with fading wheezes.
'You simply saved me the effort of executing you.' She turned towards the door, only to see the insect guard collapse, its antennas twitching like a dying cockroach. Its hand reached out for help.
She couldn't believe what she was seeing. The human might have known what it was doing after all. She panicked. Ignoring the dying guard she yanked the door open and shot into the passageway, where her Chief Insect was standing by. She pulled the door closed. 'Lock it! Lock it!'
The Chief Insect did as he was told, shutting the guard and the human in with the gas. 'What is wrong my Queen? Shall I send my troops in to investigate?'
She shook her head, sucking in huge volumes of air.
The Chief helped to steady her.
To her relief, there was no problem with her respiration. She grew calm. She even managed a cracked smile. She admired the efforts of the human, as pointless as they were. 'I have so few worthy competitors. When they’re dead, I always miss them.' She shook the Chief’s hand free and stood tall once again. 'Now we can begin.'






*2021 Update. This novel came close to getting published in 2015.
Tired of the game and the shrinking market, (pushed out even further being a non-diverse person,) I've opted to go the self publishing route. This novel should be published by 2024.


Next Week,

Back to the normal postings, poems, video poems, short stories and perhaps news of my writing. And I'm always happy to take suggestions.

Until then,
Thanks for your support.


My Books


July Novel Month - Novels No. 2 and 3 - OBLIVION CITY and OBLIVION TERMINUS




Synopsis

A giant energy wall surrounds the city, trapping everyone inside. The media call it the Rim, yet no one really knows what it is, only that it’s closing in fast and killing everything it touches. Sixteen year old Jerry and his dysfunctional family are in crisis mode and have no time for this catastrophe, but the choice is not theirs. The panic escalates as the population rushes to the city centre but terror really strikes when they discover that something nasty lurks inside the Rim, and is hungering to get out.

The News said the Evacuation was organised. They lied.
All the while the Rim is closing in… and getting faster all the time.






Oblivion City and its second part novel, Oblivion Terminus are set in a near future, with dystopian overtones. There is plenty of action and a ticking bomb style plot (with a working map of the city so readers can track the characters movements and that of the Rim). Yet the focus remains on the journey of the characters, both physically and personally as they battle for survival.





The main Characters.
(Certain characters cross over into Oblivion Terminus while new ones emerge).


Jerry – The sixteen year old ‘anti-hero’ is embroiled in his family dramas and his lust for his childhood friend Franni, who has forgotten who he is since her hormones kicked in. He’s smart, a little geeky and somewhat introspective. Jerry may think he has problems, but they’re nothing compared to what is coming. He will be forced to confront his family issues and is about to discover the worst kind of pain. He will be pushed to the limits and in the process, begin to learn what type of person he really is.

Ray - The Rim Riders Gang Leader – Ray is the most charismatic and capable of the Boyz. He’s brash and Middle Eastern and uses his vernacular to spew forth cool sounding insults. He’s also fiercely loyal to family and keen to get home. The other Riders look up to him, (except for unpredictable Junior). Ray once went to school with Jerry but was kicked out. Yet he’s soon like a hand without an arm, separated from his clan and forced to team up with his polar opposite in Jerry, making for some amusing but dramatic friction.

Junior (Gang member) – Junior is more than a rebel looking for a cause. He wants what Ray has. Power. And he’ll do anything to get it. When the Rim comes, he doesn’t see danger. He sees opportunities. And he’s carrying some nasty darkness inside that can finally be unleashed in a lawless world.

Franni (Francesca) – The sixteen year old is a modern girl living in a traditional Turkish household with her two younger sisters. While she yearns for freedom, she is desperate to return home when the Rim prevents her from doing so. She is so much more than the object of Jerry’s passions. She is a young woman with a kind heart, but whose good nature could be the very thing that brings her undone.

Jen – Jerry’s twenty-two year old sister is an emo without a cause and a clue. In Jerry’s eyes she is their father’s favourite. She has problems with depression and alcohol, and has spent way too much time at home, something she will soon regret. She will also learn that she is capable of so much more, but will it be a lesson learned too late?

Ariana – She is a twenty something DJ and somewhat of a free spirit. She also fancies men she can’t have. It’s been three years since she had a boyfriend and perhaps her dark past is to blame. Her decent but naive nature leads her to be placed in a sexually vulnerable position. But it’s her response that truly shocks her. She’s no longer sure who she is.

Nicholas & Timothy – A gay couple in their early forties who have been together for over a decade live upstairs from Ariana. They are inadvertently teamed up with her as the Rim forces them out onto the streets. Yet Nicholas’s increasing frustration with his passive partner will be forced out into the open, with devastating consequences for them all.





Inspiration

Oblivion City was written over a three year period from 2006 to 2008. It was inspired by the tragic events of Hurricane Katrina and the live news coverage that brought it immediately to our homes, the irony being that help was so late in coming. Oblivion City begins lightly but soon descends further and further into chaos as a variety of characters, many of them teenagers, are thrust into a maelstrom without the support of adults. Their tribulations reflect the troubled passing into adulthood as they struggle and often fail to overcome the obstacles before them. Only through a positive attitude and perseverance can they hope to survive. Yet many will not.

Whilst within the confines of a sci-fi action/horror blend, Oblivion City is essentially character driven. It explores many deeper issues affecting young people; alcoholism, the cult of celebrity, broken families, infidelity, homosexuality, domestic violence, rape, the role of the media in society, particularly during a disaster and the powers that govern who claim to protect us, but often bypass our basic rights.
Oblivion City is not a novel with a sequel; it’s simply one story in two parts. Oblivion Terminus is also complete. Though violent and dark, Oblivion City is also full of optimism, affection and humour and demonstrates what human beings are capable of when placed in the worst of situations.











Chapter 1

Every now and then an event occurs which turns the world on its head; The Fall of the Roman Empire, the Great Plague, World War’s One and Two. These ordeals force the human race into an almighty upheaval. For those present, Hell becomes a reality. The horror and enormity of what transpires scars those poor remaining souls, and forever alters the course of civilisation.
And it’s about to happen again.







Chapter 2
Location: Industrial Alleyway, Iremonger
Distance to Rim Closure: 25.8 kms. 5.04 pm
Friday

It's supposed to be his big day, the most exciting thing ever to hit their dull little city and all Jerry can think about is his dad hitting him the day before. It's his sister's fault, stupid bitch. Jen is similar to a Goth, but without all the black shit. An emo without a cause. Screw them both. Maybe he won't go home. Maybe he'll walk straight into the . Rim like that drunk guy and be frazzled like a moth in a ultraviolet insect trap, charred wings splayed open. Dead and famous like a celebrity. Maybe then they'll regret ganging up on him like that. Perhaps it's time he left home for good. Or strangled Jen. Or both. Maybe kill her, then leave. Throw her into the Rim instead. And toast some marshmallows while he's at it. Anyone for Jen on a stick? Actually that's pretty gross. He likes marshmallows. Or used to.
The bus pulls up. It's already full of teenage girls. Probably hoping to catch a glimpse of the Riders, those skateboarding losers. Jerry treads up the metal steps, flashes his student card and spies the only empty seat near the front. A group sniggers. Some are looking at him. Could they make it any more obvious? Is his fly undone? No. Why do they have to be so rude? Hello? Person with feelings here! He slides into the seat and fixates on the view through the fingerprint encrusted window. Bunch of bimbo's anyway. They'd be terrifying if they had a brain. Guess then they wouldn't be bimbo's. Besides, there's only one girl he's interested in. Franni. She's perfection in a pose. Full body, dark hair, luscious lips. Oh heavenly God, you must have been in a great mood that day. And her butt... Holy Moses, it's shaped like a sculptured peach. If they ever decide to hand out awards for butts, she would win the Nobel Peace Prize. Or should that be Peach Prize?
The houses whip by, one after the other. All those people. All those other kids off school today, like him. But are there other teenagers as miserable?



(Book 2: Brief Synopsis)

The Rim is growing. There’s no way out for the thousands that are trapped.
The final countdown has begun.
Yet there are more terrifying surprises in store.
Everything must end.
But can anyone survive?

(2021 update. I may publish these, those some of the tech will need to be updating. I'm thinking roughly 2025/26).


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Next Post,
An introduction to my first ever novel,
the children's fantasy,
Borders of Bordavia.

July Novel Month - Novel No. 4 - R.I.P. Rest In Prime



Synopsis

A future based on inequality. An ageing population cannot be funded by government, putting the strain back on families to look after their own. Entire generations are crammed into single houses with the greatest amount of pressure on those at the bottom. The young.
Yet they don’t want to pay for the mistakes of the past. They want their turn.
Just as the Crustys had theirs.
Some believe that transformation can only be brought about through violence.
A new Mantra flourishes.
Never Grow Old.
Teenage gangs instigate a campaign of terror.
But who is really behind it?



R.I.P. (Rest In Prime)

Aka 17 or 71


A Novel in 2 Parts. The first through the eyes of the Young, the second, the Elderly.

17 year old Barak and his 3 friends are your typical teens, looking for fun, sex and drugs. But this is not a time of freedom. All Youth must leave school early to work; such is the burden of an aged population. The Youth have had enough. They would rather die in their Prime than grow old. All they want is a piece of the lifestyle the ‘Crustys’ once had.
One night Barak leads his small gang on an escapade of intimidation, but it goes terribly wrong. He is given a choice, incarcerated for life or preserve his ‘pastime’ and dramatically up the ante.
So begins a secret life, instigating a crusade of brutality. Even a puppet realises someone is pulling the strings, but who?
The city erupts into violence. Discrimination reaches new lows. And they said it would never happen again.
But something unexpected befalls Barak. Something that will impact on his life and those close to him, forever.

It’s Our Turn Now.





Part 2 centres on 71 year old Ginny, her husband, lover, grandson and a burgeoning collection of Freedom Fighters. They face sanctioned genocide. But with those in power having a vested interest, is their mission pointless? Theirs is the only sense in a world gone crazy until they have internal problems of their own. How did it all come to this? Is this the way of the future?






Part 1
Youth – Barak




"You cannot make a revolution with silk gloves."

Stalin




Chapter 1

Babes & Boulevards


The problem with Revolution is that not all of its participants are willing.
Or even aware that it has begun.

It is early evening in the suburbs. The streets are featureless, dark, except for the radiance emanating from a Trans-Taxi shelter and the mixture of people who congregate there, notably in 2 groups. They are divided not by race or sex, but by age. The young and the rest.
4 young men, around 18 years old, emerge from the shadows, heading towards the shelter like moths to the light. Each wears an entertainment/communication wrist pad, known as IKO’s (iKayobyoshi Orbiter named after it’s Japanese inventor), as many of the young do, and are jacked into the same frequency. They rock to the same beat, that by Caralex, just 1 of the bands in the Embryonic music movement, made strictly by, and for, the Under 25’s.
On their way to the Trans-Taxi the 4 youths had run through the front yards of various properties, setting off a myriad of lights and alarms and bio flashes, which had sent their bio prints to Central Data Storage. They realise this of course but do not care. The young are few, the young are privileged. Unless they commit a serious crime, they can get away with almost anything.
One of them, Barak, makes his distinction as leader known purely by being in front of the group. A few people look at them, queue jumpers, but are quick to turn away. 2 of the young men seem as though they could be reasonable but the other 2 have purpose. And that makes all them worth avoiding.
Barak is stretching his upper body, trying to make the most of his adequate frame. ‘That girly Mash better watch out. Gridville is where I thrive.’
‘Don’t you mean, where the girls hide?’ says Sewl, the number 2 and the only 1 who can challenge Barak in this way.
‘Be careful brother,’ Barak says. ‘You would if you could but trouble is, they won't.’ He laughs.
The driverless Trans-Taxi arrives. It is the young who get on first while the older people linger in the shelter. The young moan for the Crustys to hurry up but once full, the doors close and the remaining people, all older, must wait for the next transport.
The Trans-Taxi (T.T.) reads their bio prints and subtracts a small fee from all passengers, the young being entitled to cheaper fares. The young also take up all the seats, leaving the rest to stand.
Amidst the crowd of 60 or so Barak spots an attractive girl towards the rear. He rises from his seat. A man carrying an old hessian bag in his early 50’s, and therefore a Crusty, makes for the fresh vacancy.
‘Don’t think about it rusty Crusty!’
The man looks at Barak, resentment flashing in his eyes, but hurriedly turns away, giving a single shake of his head.
Barak’s mouth drops. His number 2 in Sewl grins. The others, Kevin and the youngest, Bry appear a little more concerned. They know what this potentially means.
‘Did you see what I seen?’ Barak is almost cheerful.
Sewl nods, excitement levels rising.
‘Hey! CrustiFuk!’
The man doesn’t turn, instead grasping the light tube that has burrowed down from the ceiling after sensing his standing form.
Others back away, clearing a path, leaving the man isolated. Surrounded by people, he’s never felt so alone.






I'm not sure this novel will ever be published. It's 14 years since it was written so a lot of the speculation is out of date, while some of it has already come true. 
The concept however, is still pertinent. 


My Books


July Novel Month - Novel No. 5 - Ode to Dead Young Friends




Ode to Dead Young Friends

A Memoir by
Anthony J. Langford



The true story of four people who died too young.
A dedication to Youth.


Avita – A stunning but wild, free spirit. She is nineteen and has the world, particularly men, at her feet. Yet her desire to experiment and live on the edge is fraught with danger.
‘Life’s for fun. Live a little. ’

Andrew – A passionate country boy with fire in his blood. He loves his family and his friends and yet struggles with his emotions and his place in the world.
‘I'm not even thinking about next week. ’

Rosemary – A meek city girl just coming into her own. Some are late to the ocean, with barely a toe in, testing the waters and finally wading in, discovering how beautiful it really is, but only to be lost in a sudden wave.
‘I just… I don’t know if I can do this…’

Ryan – A confident young man with a zest for life. He is smart, well-travelled and seemingly has it all. And yet, while not as young as the others, he is still coming to terms with who is. For some people, for whatever reason, perhaps no reason at all, destiny conspires against them.
‘You do have to try and find happiness in life, wherever it is.'



Ode to Dead Young Friends
centres on the fragility of life, the bond of friendship, the rivalry’s, the intensity of emotion between friends and lovers, the misunderstanding's, insecurity's, breakdowns, the threat of violence, horrors real and imagined, learning how to manage the politics of sex, the emergence into an adult world and the devastating shock of loss.
Ode is the essence of humanity, captured in our most vulnerable time, when we are young.









(There is a long Introduction, so I will only post the first portion of it and also a snippet of Part One).



Introduction

A Funeral is an odd place to begin a story. They are usually positioned towards the end, or perhaps in the middle, if at all. Anywhere but the beginning. Publishers will tell you it's professional Hari Kari to start any type of text with a funeral scene. I suppose they assume all funerals are morbid affairs. Not so. I've heard of some tumultuous celebrations, barely disguised rip roaring, drug induced orgies. A free-for-all drunken cacophony, with wine and song and pills. Perhaps I exaggerate. However, while most people believe in an afterlife of sorts, many of us are moving away from the traditional solemn and sermon based funerals. There are now 'Green' funerals, where the deceased is buried in biodegradable material and deposited in an eco-cemetery. In parts of New Orleans, they still celebrate the Jazz Funeral, complete with a jazz band as part of the celebration. There are internet funerals too. Streamed online for those who can't make the real thing. You never have to leave your loungeroom.
One in particular that I attended a few years ago was a veritable triumphant remembrance, complete with dance music and professionally edited video. This funeral, that of a dear friend, prompted me to contemplate other funerals I've been to. Even in the midst of writing this book I've had to attend one. We do expect a certain number of funerals in our lifetime. The chances are that number will increase as we get older. Yet I sometimes think that I received them in reverse order. At a young age, I experienced far too many.







Part One - Avita


WANTED
To Share.
Three Bedroom House with Two Others.
Own Room, Good Size.
118…. Street
Ring 9… ….




Avita was Hot.
A melting, heart wrenching, saliva inducing, stormy, lustful, raging, stunner. A girl that froze the speech from leaving your mouth. A girl that made you forget every normal social introductory norm including the English language. A girl that made me hard and soft at the same time. Yet she wasn't the first of the two girls I met. It was Maree who answered the door. I'll never forget that hair. There had to be an entire can of hairspray in that one do. The chemical smell almost gave me respiratory failure. I met her eyes and had to crane my head back to see the top strand. I almost cricked my neck.
I grew up in the country and had responded to an ad in the local paper. The town itself had around thirty thousand residents and I was looking for a place to live. I was seventeen and had moved out of home the year before. Part of the reason this happened at a young age, aside from the fact that I wasn’t getting along with my parents, was that they were building a house, literally on their own. They had sold their dilapidated weatherboard, (which would be demolished by the new owners) and when they had to move to their new abode, it was nowhere near complete, not one room. My parents, brother and sister had to share a tiny caravan out back, a proverbial sardine can. The small dining table had to be folded down to make the second bed. Barely room for them let alone for a fifth. It was probably a blessing to my parents as they had their hands full as it was and I had been an introverted, extroverted, disillusioned teenager. In other words, a shit. First I lived with one set of grandparents and then the other. I was running out of options.




Coming Next,
Novel No. 4 - R.I.P. (Rest In Prime).

(2021 update: This is a very heartfelt book. Most of it is true. I'm not certain I will publish it. It needs some rewriting. 


My Books



July Novel Month - Novel No. 6 Tru Luv Kills - A Teenage Bonnie and Clyde

A series detailing my six completed novels in reverse order.




Tru Luv Kills
A Teenage Bonnie & Clyde

Love is a Dirty Word.
Synopsis.

Laura was fifteen when she first met Xavier. By sixteen a friend of theirs was dead. But was it an accident, manslaughter or murder?

Laura is beautiful, headstrong but with seemingly no thoughts for others. When she meets the boy with the dark hair and brooding complexion, it’s like a lighter dating a can of petrol. Some people just shouldn’t be together.

Tru Luv Kills is told by a mutual school friend as it unfolds. She recounts how Laura’s introduction to her group changes all of them amidst the pace of becoming adults literally overnight, dealing with sex and teen pregnancy, alcohol and drugs, the dangers of social media, separated family’s and violence and her own battle with depression.

In the middle of it all are the lovers and watch out if anyone gets in their way. What makes people do the things they do? Why do people have to hurt others? You may think you have your friends figured out, but do we ever really know anyone?

Only bad can be born from their union, but nothing can stop them from being together.

Based on a true story.



She called herself the Perfect Loser. And was proud of it.




First Page.



My Diary
(Not to be read by anyone unless you have permission, which is pretty unlikely so put it back Mum!)

March 16

Do you think people meet for a reason? I sometimes wonder what brings certain people together. I'm not talking about your Valentine’s Day fantasy affairs with candles and roses and all that. I’m talking about the Bonnie and Clyde's of this world, like Myra Hindley and Ian Brady, Fred and Rosemary West or even O.J. Simpson and Nicole Brown. My mum is a bit of a crime nut and gets me to watch those shows with her. The worst one I ever saw was right here in Australia, the Birnies. David and Catherine. Even their names sound innocent. But they’re about as sick as you can get. I don’t even like thinking about them. If you knew what would happen you'd stop them from ever meeting. Any of those people. It's like a match dating a petrol can. On their own they’re still dangerous, but together…
Some people feel as though they've met before, as though they have shared a life in a faraway country, or maybe in another life. I can't explain that. I just know that some people shouldn't be together, that only bad can be born from their union. Some people are doomed, don’t you think?
I guess I’m leading up to it. I mean, I don't really know if I should be writing this because it's very personal even though a lot of it isn't about me. It feels like I'm invading other people’s lives, especially when one of them is dead and can't speak for themselves. It was so horrible, so unjust, that it ripped me up from the inside. I tried to ignore it, because I had spent way too much time thinking about it. It upset me so much. It still upsets me. It's like a black sludge living inside me. A twisted mess that I have to get out. I keep trying but I can’t get it all out. It’s like a parasite escaping from my stomach. I guess it looks like I'm going to tell the story anyway, maybe just to set the record straight. Hopefully it'll make it easier for me to concentrate on my normal life. Who knows? Maybe it will do some good. I'd even settle for a full night's sleep. Or even a day without my head full of shit.
I am worried you see, because I don't want anyone knowing who I am. This is going to be hard as I'm a part of what happened. I can't really delete myself from the story. So I've decided to tell it from a third person point of view. Maybe you'll be able to work out who I am and maybe I'll even feel brave enough by the end to come clean, but right now I'm going to remain anonymous. It's not like I asked for this to happen. It just did. I wished I had changed suburbs or even cities. But why would I? My life was actually going okay. I had no idea I would be so close to a murder, especially at my age. It’s disturbing. And it’s fresh. The aftermath is still going on as I write this. But I can't begin with the murder. I'll have to go back, before Laura and Xavier began going out, otherwise it won't make sense.
So there I was, going about my everyday life, and like most people, caught up in my own little world. But as I would soon discover, sometimes the world isn't yours at all. And you have to struggle just to hang on.



Coming Next,

Novel No. 5 - Ode to Dead Young Friends. A Memoir.

I'll hope you will drop by.

Until then,
=]


*2021 Update. I think this novel is my best. I will publish it in either 2022 or '23.


My Books