In the quiet of her bedroom

jo-fraser - decadence and decay

In the quiet of her bedroom

She did not realise

(had no comprehension)

That she was making

(had just made)

The biggest mistake of her life.

Let’s face it

We rarely know

When we are making even a small mistake

Or else we wouldn’t make them at all.

She lowered that crown of thorns

And rammed it in place

Secured in flesh.

All she had done

Was to express how she felt

To the man she adored

Was almost at one with

(inside at least).

She could not have known

How it would snowball, steam roll

Up or down

Analogy’s don’t adequately represent

The hurt

The shame

The gossip

The accusations

       

The far reaching effects    

Into every aspect of her life

Like a movie promise spotlight

Into her dark diary bedroom corners.

Edvard Munch

And yet,

There was always the danger

That her sister’s boyfriend

Would reject her

And talk like a spy traitor backstabber

Yet she was too deeply immersed

Committed beyond reproach

To the fantasy

Of the opposite occurring

That it seemed almost

A foregone conclusion

A life in pictures

And sounds and sensations

Just waiting for time to catch up.

Without risk

There would be nothing

Yet now,

It all had changed for the worse

And she found herself longing

For the simple torment

Of her prior longing

Or better still

Her life before love.

(written in 2012)

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